Everything You Want is On the Other Side of Fear

Four words that cross my mind every second I am here:

This place is amazing.

When we began our journey, the word “Africa,” to me, was synonymous with a flat, dry, savannah, lots of boboa trees, very Lion King-esque. And though we did see a sunrise that came straight out of the movie as we flew into Ethiopia (a plethora of firey reds and oranges, fading into light blue and then darker, darker, and darker until the sky wove into outer space) the vast plains and desert that I pictured were not present in Arusha, Tanzania. Upon arrival, we were met with forests of green trees and vibrant red, pink, and purple flowers, and had to wrap ourselves tightly in our jackets to combat the chilly winter weather. On Saturday, we took a tour of the city, led by a very personable man named Rasta John. He took us on a walk through Arusha, showing us the markets and museums here and giving us a glimpse into what makes Tanzania unique.

Our very first volunteer experience was on Sunday, at an orphanage called Cradle of Love. Cradle of Love is composed 100% of babies and toddlers, and when we arrived at the orphanage I could feel my heart being stolen by these children. Since we were the only volunteers there at the time, there were more babies to a person than we could count. At one point, I was pushing four different babies on three different swings. We fed the babies, played with the babies, and held the babies, but most importantly we gave massive amounts of love to each and every one of them. I am so incredibly glad that our first act of volunteering was at COL, because it opened my heart up and prepared me to extend my love unto the children at the school.

Today was our first day at LOAMO English Medium School. LOAMO, consisting of 270 students and 17 teachers, is a primary school with classes ranging from Baby Class, Kinder, and Pre-Unit all the way to Class 7. Extremely early on in their education, they become completely fluent in English, and are able to learn without speaking a word of Swahili. This vigor exists in every aspect of their education, from comprehensive English classes to extremely advanced science and math classes. The school in general is much more advanced than I expected. Despite being eleven years old, the kids in Class 5 began their science lesson by reviewing how digestive enzymes in the mouth break down starch into glucose. Upon hearing this, I was completely taken aback- I hadn’t learned this information until my sophomore year of high school! I had been expecting to teach mostly English to semi-fluent students, and here I was, completely out of my element and not prepared for the level of learning and the work ethic of both the kids and the teachers. To be honest, it was terrifying.

As the day went on my nerves calmed, and I got more and more comfortable interacting with students and being a helpful presence in the classroom. Throughout the day I was grading papers, explaining mathematical equations, and I even got to teach a history lesson on the slave trade. At this point in the day I was shaking with nerves, enough to make myself dizzy, but I could feel myself getting more and more comfortable as the lesson went on. I think that this will be a common theme throughout this trip: my confidence being tested, my fear being a wall that I have to get over in order to help the kids at this school. Overcoming barriers like these is one of the things that makes every experience with this organization incredible- I can feel my growth as a person with every day that passes. Lisa Marie once recited a quote at one of our meetings that has stuck with me since: “Everything you want is on the other side of fear.” Today on this service trip, getting up in front of a classroom and ignoring my sweaty palms as I talked about sugar cane plantations and saw attentive eyes and an encouraging teacher, I heard that quote ring true.

Something that consistently amazes me on my service trips is the energy and vibrance that these kids have. During break times I played never-ending games of tag with kids who literally fell over from laughter. Even though sprinting after 5-year-olds is completely exhausting, the energy drain is worth it to see their toothy smiles. The little kids would wrap their arms around your legs in a warm embrace, and the older kids would surround you and ask you about your life. Morning assembly is the best example of this energy. The kids are jumping and stomping and yelling to the beat of several drums, and their excitement makes you excited to immerse yourself in their school and do everything you can to help.

What I want to focus on for the remainder of this trip is being a bigger force in the classroom. Although I did get the hang of assisting in the class, and I dipped my toes in the water of teaching, I want to be able to share my knowledge and really make an impact in the school. The kids here are incredible, unique, and impossible to describe, and I have fallen in love with them already. If I didn’t want to help them to the best of my ability before, I do now. They deserve my complete attention and effort, which means more work when we come home planning lessons and researching what they are studying, and I am prepared to do all of it.